Facebook Official!

Well, on this day 5 YEARS AGO,  Matt and I became "Facebook Official!" and changed our status' to "in a relationship"  This blog is going to be about how much Matt has meant to me over the last few months.  I'll try to spare you a ton of the mushy stuff!

The chorus of this Martina McBride song illustrates exactly what Matt has been to me through this...

"He took her in his arms and said "That's what my love is for"
When you're weak, I'll be strong
When you let go, I'll hold on
When you need to cry, I swear that I'll be there to dry your eyes
When you feel lost and scared to death,
Like you can't take one more step
Just take my hand, together we can do it
I'm gonna love you through it.
And when this road gets too long
I'll be the rock you lean on
Just take my hand, together we can do it
I'm gonna love you through it."

I could not have asked for a better partner in life. Sometimes I wonder how I got so lucky.  I honestly don't know where I would be in this journey without him.  He has helped me in my healing process more than he knows.  (I guess he will know now :) )  On Halloween night when we discovered McKinley no longer had a heartbeat, I was devastated.  After her delivery and over the course of the next 2 weeks, I cried daily, and most days many times.  Each time different things would trigger the tears.  Going into the closet to get dressed and all I saw were maternity clothes, thinking that I felt her move but knowing it couldn't be because she was no longer there, looking at her ultrasound picture that is still on our refrig, walking into the room that was suppose to be her nursery, seeing the blanket that my grandmother knitted for her.   Matt took the week off that she was born and then he worked from home the next week.  It was good to just have him here with me.  Anytime Matt saw the tears start to fill my eyes, he would completely stop what he was doing and come to my side.  After I calmed down, he always asked me what triggered the tears. We just sat there and talked about exactly what made me cry (which was different most times.)  Even though sometimes, I just didn't want to talk about it, I still did.  I believe this has helped tremendously in my grieving and healing process.   Talking and communication with each other through this has also brought us closer in our marriage. 

I would like to say thank you to my wonderful husband, Matt who has been my soft place to land during the hardest time in my entire life.   Thank you for always being there for me.  I love you with my whole heart.